Michael Cera Facts
Fact 1: Michael admits that he would have a threesome with Martha Stewart and Paul Rudd.
Fact 2: Michael says he gets Fan Mail from prison.
Fact 3: Michael’s favorite food is Pizza.
Fact 4: Michael’s favorite TV Show is Breaking Bad.
Fact 4: Michael has been mugged before in Chile.
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One time I was on a rollercoaster and a guy’s hat fell off during one of the loops but he caught it when we were right side up again, and i have to go my whole life knowing I’ll never be as cool as that guy.
(Source: deersjaw, via moistbottom)
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i want to kiss you and take cute pictures with you and go on stupid dates but I also want tO DESTRYO YOU AT MAR IO KART
(Source: longful, via pandasplosion)
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poops and weighs self again
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if you wanna be my lover, you gotta deal with my
ANNOYING AND OBSESSIVE PERSONALITY
(Source: jincked, via pizza)
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how to be cool
A) cool sunglasses emoji
is that a god damn pun. in emoticon format
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things said in majority of movies:
- "I TRUSTED YOU!!"
- "she’s not just some girl!"
- "I should have told you this a long time ago."
- "I’m not a little girl anymore!!"
- "but I love him!!"
-“You’re giving up your dream!”
“No dad, I’m giving up YOUR dream.”
"I knew your father. He was a good man."
*girl walks downstairs*
Guy: Wow… you look… great.
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remember when ryan seacrest tried to high five a blind guy
(Source: snorlaxatives, via overcastblur)
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people get angrier about their tax money going towards helping people than it going towards killing people
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why do americans start their school years in the middle of the year that makes no fucking sense
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Don’t mess with Apartment 4D
THEN LOOK AT MY ASS
(Source: katnisstrinket, via summerfinns)
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